Guiding as a practice
Guiding meditation can be a meditation practice in itself. I'm going to attempt to share this way of seeing.
After reading this, I hope you can see that your meditation session starts even before your guiding session starts and only ends after the last person has left.
Let's work from the following meditation definition:
Meditation is the act of intentionally cultivating certain mental traits using a set of exercises.
So, how does guiding fit in there?
What are we cultivating? And how are we doing it?
Every guided meditation is an opportunity to develop at least two incredible qualities:
Kindness: Am I acting in such a way that considers my needs and other people's needs?
Mindfulness: What are those needs anyway? Can I recognise them? Can I keep them in my mind?
Some questions you can work with:
How are you affected by being late? How is the group affected by you being late? Okay, so you're late, how do you relate to that in such a way that benefits everybody?
Do you have enough teacups? Do you have enough tea? How does it affect people if they are left out because of your preparations? How do you relate to this mistake?
Can you notice how a messy set up affects the group? Have you reordered the room in such a way that it makes for a more enjoyable space?
Should you bring more cookies next time?
Are you including everyone in the group? How do you include people in the group that you dislike?
How can you support a group when you're stressed or sad, while also taking care of yourself?
Everyone has a deep need to be heard, but most people only rarely get the opportunity. How do you offer this opportunity to others? Are you offering this opportunity? Can you let go of yourself when you listen?
How do you receive feedback in a gracious way? Can you see feedback as a way to grow, instead of a judgement of who you are? Can you recognise that you can still improve on something, even when you have worked on it for many hours?
If someone is suffering or sharing difficulty, how can you relate to that in the most helpful way?
How do you relate to nerves? How do you need to prepare to explain what meditation is, while being so nervous that you only function at 30% capacity?
How do you relate to failing miserably while guiding? Can you forgive yourself? Can you ask for help?
Of course, hidden in here are many other beautiful traits that you can cultivate, like compassion, the ability to listen and lessening the sense of self.
It all comes down to intention
Answering and working with these questions often doesn't come naturally. You don't work on them automatically if you start guiding. If you want to grow these traits, you have to go to your guiding session and actively work with them. Just like you do in your regular practice, you have to start your session with a clear intention.
If you don't, then you're still cultivating things. Anything you experience in consciousness updates your mind. Where you could be developing an eye for attention and detail, compassion and all kinds of kindness, you might slowly start growing the ego.
All these people come to the guided meditation to listen to you. To hear your magnificent advice. You understand how the mind works and they just become the vessel to express yourself.
You might start arriving later. They should be happy that you're willing to spend your time guiding. You could have been doing other things. The chairs are fine as they are and it is quite easy to forget that there haven't been any cookies for four days in a row.
Life can be your practice
If you read this above, you might be thinking. If I can see meditation like this, if buying cookies can be a practice, then basically my whole life can be my practice.
And I think you're right! Every moment can become an opportunity to cultivate a nicer mind, but that can be a little overwhelming. So, don't worry about, don't strive for it. That is a lot of pressure.
Guiding as a practice can be the perfect intermediate step. It is very doable. I hope you're willing to try.
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